How An Unorganized Person Moves To Another Country
In the spirit of getting off to an honest start with these writings, I’ll admit that I am not the most put-together person. I have never been and I’ve learned to accept it. The concerning issue about this personality trait is that it can present some challenges when leaving the safety bubble of American life. I knew what I was getting myself into, and I swear I did my best to get my affairs in order. I looked at travel sites, sought advice from digital nomads, and read the blogs of other expats. I found checklists, how-to's, and step-by-step guides on formulating a well thought out plan for starting a life abroad. The information was useful, but it didn’t get this (what’s the opposite of A-type?) chick very far.
Eventually, I accepted the circumstances, which are bound to be less than ideal. There are always things unforeseen, moments of disappointment and inevitable struggle. Moreso than anything, the cold hard truth is the advantages which most expert, blogging, nomading millennials (a label that I wear very loosely) can leverage into a smooth transition - IT skills, corporate connections, youth - are not attributes which I possess.
But, hey. Such is life. Moving forward with the cards that I’m dealt, I decided to concentrate on doable steps to prevent this transition from becoming a disastrous one. I gave myself one year to lift off and thought it would be best to simply take a humanistic approach to preparing for this major life change. Here’s the rough chronology of basic necessities I focused on before departing:
Money
There’s no way around it. Like I mentioned before, saving A LOT of money was probably the most important step.
Community
One of the main reasons I chose Amsterdam is because I already knew someone living here. She is one of the founders of Amsterdam Black Women, a community of expats. I reached out to them right away. It was through this community that I made friends, became involved in local happenings, and even found housing! I learned that it also helped to start talking about my plans with other people. There's a common saying: “just put it out to the universe.” I felt like that happened with every conversation. There’s always someone who knows someone, somewhere. I quickly found that I was connected to way more people in Europe than I initially thought, and I was already building community.
Basics
With an understanding that I would soon be without resources, I took care of all my essentials before leaving: physical exams, teeth cleaning, eyeglasses, etc. I updated my capsule wardrobe (including outerwear for those cold rainy days), made sure my devices were up to snuff, and set price alerts for my plane ticket.
The rest was up in the air. "Just be open to an adventure," my friend advised. I took it to heart and hoped for the best. My arrival in Amsterdam was a bit rocky: luggage lost for two days; and, in an attempt to switch over to a Dutch number, I accidentally locked myself out of my cell phone, cutting me off from most means of communication for five days - I was miserable. In spite of that, I did a couple of things to establish some normalcy:
Circle the block
I went exploring. Took a stroll through my neighborhood and absorbed my surroundings. The first glance of my new residence was quite magical
Check-in
I hit up every single person I had connected with before I left. There weren't many, but the few people that I knew were super responsive, bless their hearts. They all made time to check in, hang out and made sure I was getting along.
Everything else was about processing the shock. Small things, like purchasing peanut butter from the local market, were no longer small things - Dutch for peanut butter is “pindakaaas.” Street signs and bike etiquette felt foreign to me. The biggest shock was suddenly living in a place with no close friends, no family, and no job. Naturally, I had my low moments of panic and loneliness. Here’s how I decisively kept my sanity.
Community
You might be noticing a common thread at this point. In addition to tapping into the aforementioned network, I sought community in other ways. By making good use of platforms like InterNations and Meetups, I found it easy to connect with people with whom I shared common interests. I’m still quite blown away by how friendly everyone has been. My intention is to build some regularity within these spaces. I’ve also been hopping on a few dating apps, mostly out of boredom, but I’ve connected with some really cool dudes. More on that later...
Ritual
In a reality of unknowns, it’s really nice to have a routine. When I wake up in the morning, I fix myself coffee, do some stretches and go for a walk. The consistency of daily ritual is grounding.
Localize
It didn’t take me long to find a local haunt - a couple actually. The first one, and probably most important, is a daytime cafe. Since I don’t have an office to report to during the day, it’s nice to change the scenery with a place where I can rely on a decent cup of coffee and strong wifi. The second haunt is a local bar - Cafe de Pianist. It’s a neighborhood favorite. Super chill, very charming, sometimes there’s live piano, and I can get a nice glass of wine for 3 euro. I like it there. After a while, people start to feel familiar to me, and I to them. Occasionally, a local will offer me a piece of chocolate. It’s nice.
The priority in all this is making sure my needs are met. I listen to my body and cherish my health. With limited access to medical services and zero net income, it is imperative that I take care of myself. Connecting with humans, exercising, and establishing some sort of routine have been excellent ways of doing just that.
Many days, my life feels chaotic, and I’ve found leaning into intuition to be beneficial. Hopefully, it will set the foundation for a healthy new life that I look forward to settling into.